Immune System Problems

Among the many things I did not anticipate when my wife’s condition developed was that fact that her immune system is constantly suppressed. The slightest cold or sinus thing that has me back up and around in a day or two will knock her out for weeks. It’s the same with things like cuts and scrapes. Sometimes is takes a cut months to heal on her skin – her skin which is already ravaged by searing pain, uncontrollable temperature and color changes, and general crapiness.

I talked to her earlier today, and she is sick. I mean sick sick. The kind of sick when you can’t breath through your nose and your voice drops to James Earl Jones levels (“Luke, I am your father..”). Non-RSDers would probably be over this in a couple days, but with her immune system being down for so long, she will probably be out of commission for a couple weeks. That’s bad enough, but consider the fact that it is a cold today, and it will be something else tomorrow. It is an endless series of illnesses which never give her immune system a fighting chance to recover. You hacky sack-playing hippies out there are probably saying, “Take Echinacea and Vitamin C, man.” Yeah. Take that advice and hop back in the Prius to follow the Dave Matthews Band around the country, cause it ain’t workin’.

I said it a couple posts ago, and this is just another example of the fact that, with RSD, comes a whole host of other conditions that co-exist with the fire in her veins that never lets up. I wish like hell there was something I could do. I want so badly to take it all away. She is a good person (well, former deviant, but she’s good now). Her faith is strong. She does not question God the way I probably would. The truth is, her strength in putting up with RSD and me simultaneously is amazing. One day, she’ll know why this was planned for her. I’d love to know the answer too because, unlike her, I am jaded and pessimistic. I don’t see what good could possibly come from a plan that involves someone having RSD.

I am not mad at God; I just don’t see things from His perspective sometimes. Hopefully, I will have that “Ah Ha” moment one day. Unfortunately, I won’t be around to tell any of you about it. I’ll be one of two places. The place where I meet the Lord and am reunited with all the people I have loved and lost, or the place where Rick Springfield's "Jessie's Girl" plays for all eternity. God, please make it the first one.
I promise I’ll be good.